A Broken Man + the Dawn Chapter 3 (Podfic - Read By Me)

Read along with me. n_nami's fic is at https://archiveofourown.org/works/979369/chapters/1971321. I read this fan fiction with her kind permission.

Chapter 1

Chapter 2 

Grey: Fifty Shades of Grey as Told by Christian

I finally finished listening to the audio book version of Grey: Fifty Shades of Grey as Told by Christian by E.L. James. I must say, I genuinely enjoyed it, in no small part to the voice acting talent of Zachary Webber.

Many of my thoughts about this audio book are captured in my status updates over the two months it took me to "read" this book on my commute. (Click on the image or zoom to make it more readable.)

I enjoyed this as a lengthy and complicated piece of Twilight fan fiction, and I find that I genuinely care about these fictional characters. I want Ana and Christian to succeed as a couple. Of course we know they do - they finish as a nice married couple with two children - but they're actually broken up at the end of the first novel of the trilogy. It's a downer ending, made somewhat more hopeful in this version.

I really do get a kick out of the way Kate irks Christian.

But I still don't want to see the movie. Jamie Dornan is quite attractive, and being a person of Northern Irish descent myself I quite like him, but I like my imaginary Christian Grey better. He doesn't resemble any living person that I know of, although from here on out he may sound like Zachary Webber in my imagination.

I do think Kristen Stewart would have made an amazing Ana, though. That's not a slight against Dakota Johnson. I find her beautiful and charming.

Dakota Johnson. Creative Commons image by GabboT

I feel especially compelled to protect and defend the young Ms. Johnson, and I suppose it's because I've long felt compelled to protect her mother, Melanie Griffith. Do you all remember The Bust Guide to the New Girl Order?

It was first published in 1999, and it's very, very '90s. It represents some of the early work featured in the women's magazine, which started out as a small feminist/girl culture zine, itself a very 1990s concept. I mention the anthology because it contains an essay called "Bring Me the Head of Melanie Banderas" by Sarah Feldman writing as Dixie LaRue. It's much meaner and snarkier than what Bust publishes today, and it's all about what a terrible actress and human being Melanie Griffith (married to Antonio Banderas at the time) is.

Like a Judge-y Judy, Dixie LaRue recounts Griffith's crimes against womankind, including getting multiple tattoos (!) and having breast implants. Body shaming much? She takes Griffith to task for starring in sexist movies but doesn't question why the movie-going public lets filmmakers get away with pernicious gender stereotyping and sexist slander. It's very old school, and it makes me want to wrap Griffith in a nice warm blanket, hand her a latte, and assure her she's worthy of love and respect.

So, with absolutely no offense meant to Jamie Dornan or Dakota Johnson, I'll just watch the "movie" inside my head and fan-cast it with the Twilight cast members.

"Lelliot" hates jellyfish.

If I were summing up this book in one sentence, it would be, "A brave woman explores the limits of her sexuality; a recovering abuse victim explores the limits of his emotional vulnerability." And I liked it.

https://amzn.to/42GybAg - this is an affiliate link

'Loving Loki' by Cheryl Pillsbury

I have much to say about this little book - some of it good, some of it not so good - but first, full disclosure: Cheryl Pillsbury is or was the publisher at AG Press, a small press for which I once did some editing. I edited poetry, fiction, and nonfiction for several authors, including Cheryl, only some of which I was paid for.

I don't think she ever had any bad intentions, but I do think she wasn't quite financially or organizationally prepared to deal with the publishing business. I didn't make money on the experience, but I did learn to be more skeptical of small press publishers I met online. It was a good learning experience overall.

As an editor of Cheryl's books, I noticed some consistent writing errors and overall poor sentence structure. To be perfectly fair, Cheryl is, for a large part, a fan fiction author writing for her own pleasure. She has written works using characters from several franchises, some of which have run her into occasional trouble with the copyright holders. This book can be thought of as a work of fan fiction, not of a copyrighted franchise but of Norse mythology.

I don't think it's completely forthcoming when the introduction states that the Marvel Comic Universe film franchise was not an influencing factor, though. For example, reference is made to Jane Foster, who is clearly a Marvel Comics character and not a person from Norse mythology. But that's okay. Authors are allowed to be inspired, although not allowed to infringe. They are two different things. Even bestselling author Linda Lael Miller admits she finds inspiration in TV, movies, and country music. The trick is to make the characters original enough that they are clearly your own creations.

Cheryl is a practicing Neopagan, and she claims in her introduction to the book that her work of fiction is based on the deities whom she worships. I don't have a problem with that. I wrote Shiva into Midsummer Night in a scene that is both reverential and erotic; I don't belong to any one religion, but I do love Hinduism's Shiva and Kali. They are some of my deities.

And Cheryl and I are certainly not the only ones who incorporate erotic writing into a form of religious worship or ceremony. See, for example, this piece of Easter meditation by Joan Borysenko. That said, you would not be completely out of your mind if you were to envision Tom Hiddleston in his role as Loki Laufeyson as the Norse deity described in the text.

The Brass Tacks:

Why Should I Read This Book?

Read this book is you've longed for erotic fan fiction featuring the Norse trickster god Loki in a relationship with an original character (OC).

Purchase link: http://www.lulu.com/shop/cheryl-t-pillsbury/loving-loki/paperback/product-22021581.html

Note that I am not an affiliate of Lulu.com and you going to the above URL will not benefit me in any way. I purchased a copy of this book with my own funds and was not compensated in any way for reviewing it.

Add It On Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/25473887-loving-loki

Why Shouldn't I Read This Book?

You shouldn't read this book if you'll be bothered by unpolished writing that needs an editor. You can offer to edit for Cheryl if you're a kind-hearted and very patient beta reader who does it for love of the genre without any expectation of financial reward - if, for example, you're a high school student who just wants to get some editing experience under his or her belt before majoring in English in college.

Are There Any Thorki Moments in This Book?

Only one comes to mind: a scene of Thor and Loki sleeping side-by-side. For the most part, it's a love story between Loki and the OC, a Midgardian woman named Sira. There's even a Neopagan-style handfasting ceremony between them.

For some people, the gift of being able to turn out polished, professional writing comes easily. Others need a second set of eyes to help them reach the polished stage. There's nothing wrong with being a diamond-in-the-rough fanfic writer. Many of us will read these unpolished gems if the story is good and the characters are strongly written. If you hope to advance as a professional writer, though, you absolutely need a polisher.

This is an affiliate link:

The Wheel of The Year. . by Maureen Murrish. $5.99 from Smashwords.com
The Wheel of the Year is a beginner's guide to celebrating the eight traditional pagan festivals of the the year.

Fan Fiction Obsession of the Week: Bound and Gagged

"Bound and Gagged" by Caroline, a.k.a. BlackHoleCastiel.  That is the Destiel fan fiction I've been obsessed with this week. Hear me out on this:

1) In this fictional universe, Dean (he has no last name in this short chapter) is a god. He's sort of a Greek-style god, a male version of Artemis, only not so much with the chastity. But he's the god of wild things, with a large collection of hunters who serve him. He has sons; their number is not specified.

2) To appease him, his mortals have to offer him an annual human sacrifice, who is supposed to be a willing volunteer. This volunteer is taken to Dean's temple, where the god appears bodily to claim his sacrifice, in front of the entire congregation.

And get this: the high priest's name is Azazel. Apparently Azazel appears as a character on Supernatural? But Caroline describes him as a "mean old drunk," so I doubt he's the dazzling beauty of a fallen angel* we explored in Cover Him With Darkness.

3) A boy named Castiel - for the sake of not being creepy and gross, let us assume "boy" here refers to a man between the ages of 18 and 21 - is most emphatically NOT a volunteer. He's being sold by his parents to pay their rather hefty bar tab!

4) But do not worry, because Dean has no intention of killing his not-so-willing sacrifice. He has another kind of claiming in mind. Ancient Greek-style sex ensues. Yes, in front of everyone.

This is supposedly only the first chapter. Castiel now has the honor of being promoted from "temple boy" (I'm imagining something like a Roman Catholic church's altar server) to god's consort.

Some thoughts:

It's a nice twist to have Cas be the bewildered mortal and Dean the powerful supernatural being. It's the opposite of both the TV show and what I tried to do in the Cupid & Psyche fic.

Despite the title, it doesn't seem that Cas is actually gagged. He keeps screaming, so I'm imagining he's just tied up and allowed to scream at will.

Dean threatens to eat Cas, causing Cas to flinch away from his beautiful but intimidating god. However, Dean means this in a sexual rather than carnivorous way, and that is an adorable little detail.

Personally, I can't imagine young!Castiel being as attractive as present Castiel. This is Misha Collins in his early 20s.

He's skinny, his hair is a lighter color, and it looks as if he borrowed that suit from a larger person - Jared Padalecki, perhaps. Like Laura Prepon, Misha Collins gets better with age and with darker hair. He is much prettier at age 40 than he was at 24-ish.

So if I were writing this story, I would have a much older Castiel tied to the altar. And gagged. I mean, if we're going to play around with a light bondage paradigm, then let's do the thing.

Also, I would have played up the "I'm going to eat you"/oral angle A LOT more before getting to the actual intercourse. That's more of a personal preference than a literary criticism, of course.

The writer is very young (14, if her Tumblr page is accurate) and I certainly don't want to discourage anyone from writing, ever, but this is a literary criticism: This fic commits the big guy-guy erotica sin of omitting lube. Kids, when we write anal, we write in some lube, k? It's true that ancient cultures didn't have AstroGlide, but they at least had olive oil, which was better than nothing.

I think I would have made the setting private, too. I think in the fic, god!Dean likes the naughtiness of scandalizing his mortals by "consuming" his sacrifice in front of their eyes. But if Castiel and god!Dean are going to end up having actual feelings for each other - and it's not guaranteed that they are - their first time together would be much more romantic in private. Maybe Dean appears to Azazel to accept the sacrifice, but then tells the priest to leave the temple. Azazel leaves the temple thinking Castiel is going to be literally eaten as a snack, clueless that god!Dean is much more horny than hungry. But again, that's more of a stylistic preference than a literary criticism.

I look forward to a second chapter.

*Speaking of fallen angels, I forgot to mention in my Crouching Tiger, Forbidden Vampire review that Lucifer is described in that book as being indescribably, almost painfully beautiful, but with utterly dead eyes.

Mark Pellegrino is Supernatural's Lucifer. I added his monologue from John Milton's Paradise Lost, because literary.

Cupid and Psyche Mash-Up - #Destiel AU Pt. 2

Part One is here.

Dean slept peacefully that night enfolded in his lover's wings, but woke up alone. The sun's first light revealed a trace of his lover in the form of a single feather, black at first glance but shimmering with all the colors of the rainbow when held in the light.

This half-and-half companionship could not fully content Dean; still he was happy and the time passed swiftly. One night, however, his dear though unseen husband spoke gravely to him and warned him that danger in the shape of his brother was approaching. "Sam is coming to the hill where you disappeared, to weep for you," he said, "but you must not let him see you or you will bring great sorrow upon me and ruin to yourself."

Dean promised he would not, but all the next day he passed in weeping, thinking of his brother and himself unable to comfort him. He was still in tears when his husband came and even his caresses could not check them. At last he yielded sorrowfully to Dean's great desire.

"Do what you will," he said, "but you are seeking your own destruction." Then he warned Dean solemnly not to be persuaded by Sam to try to see him, on pain of being separated from him forever.

Dean cried out that he would never do so. He would die a hundred times over rather than live without him. "But give me this joy," he said: "to see my brother." Sadly Dean's husband promised him that it should be so.

The next morning Sam came, brought down from the mountain by Zephyr. Happy and excited, Dean was waiting for him. It was long before the two brothers could speak to each other; their joy was too great to be expressed except by tears and embraces. But when at last they entered the palace and Sam saw its surpassing treasures, when he sat at the rich banquet and heard the marvelous music, bitter envy took possession of him and a devouring curiosity as to who was the lord of all this magnificence and his brother's husband.

"Texts From the Impala" Meme. http://thatwritererinoriordan.tumblr.com/post/102088409445

But Dean kept faith; he told Sam only that his husband was a young man, away now on a hunting expedition. "How is Jessica?" Dean asked, changing the subject.

"Jess is fine. She's huge - I mean, she's very pregnant. We're going to have a little prince or princess."

Dean gave Sam another hug. "Congratulations, bro."

"Thanks. So, no babies for you, huh?"

"We don't need babies to be happy."

Sam seemed to notice something. "What's this thing around your neck?"

Dean smiled. "My leather collar. Do you like it?"

"He put a collar on you - like you're his slave, or his dog?"

"No, he gave me this collar as a gift because he loves me. It's pretty, it smells good, and sometimes - at just the right moment - he slips two fingers inside it and it tightens up just enough..."

"That's sick, Dean."

"No! It's nice. It's like when he pulls my hair. Don't you ever pull Jessica's hair?"

"Dude, no. She's a queen; she would have me beheaded. Dean, he treats you horribly, but you're so innocent you think that's love."

"You're wrong, Sam. Not everybody has to love the same way. Jessica is a tiny person compared to you, so you're sweet and gentle with her. My husband can be very sweet and gentle, and other times, he shoves me against the wall - and I like that. I know he loves me."

Then filling Sam's hands with gold and jewels, he had Zephyr bear him back to the hill. "See you later, jerk."

Sam went willingly enough, but his heart was on fire with jealousy. "Not if I see you first, bitch." All his own wealth and good fortune seemed as nothing compared with Dean's, and his envious anger so worked in him that he came finally to plotting how to ruin him.

That very night Dean's husband warned him once more. Dean would not listen when he begged him not to let Sam come again.  "You can never see me," he reminded Dean. Was Dean also to be forbidden to see all others, even his brother so dear to him?

He yielded as before, and very soon Sam arrived, with his plot carefully worked out. Already, because of Dean's stumbling and contradictory answer when Sam asked him what his husband looked like, he had become convinced that Dean had never set eyes on him and did not really know what he was. Sam did not tell Dean this, but he reproached his older brother for hiding his terrible state from him, his own brother. Sam had learned, he said, and knew for a fact, that Dean's husband was not a man, but the fearful serpent demon Apollo's oracle had declared he would be. He was kind now, no doubt, but he would certainly turn upon him some night and devour him.

Dean, aghast, felt terror flooding his heart instead of love. He had wondered so often why his husband would never let him see him. There must be some dreadful reason. What did he really know about him? If he was not horrible to look at, then he was cruel to forbid him ever to behold him. In extreme misery, faltering and stammering he gave his brother to understand that he could not deny what he said, because he had been with him only in the dark. "There must be something very wrong," he sobbed, "for him so to shun the light of day." And he begged Sam to advise him.

Sam had his advice all prepared beforehand: That night Dean must hide a sharp knife and a lamp near his bed. When his husband was fast asleep he must leave the bed, light the lamp, and get the knife. He must steel himself to plunge it swiftly into the body of the frightful being the light would certainly show him. "I will be near," Sam said, "and carry you away with me when he is dead."

Then Sam left Dean torn by doubt and distracted what to do. Dean loved him; he was his dear husband. No; he was a horrible serpent demon and he loathed him. He would kill him — he would not. He must have certainty — he did not want certainty. So all day long his thoughts fought with each other. When evening came, however, he had given the struggle up. One thing he was determined to do: He would see him.

When at last he lay sleeping quietly, Dean summoned all his courage and lit the lamp. He tiptoed to the bed and holding the light high above him he gazed at what lay there.

http://thatwritererinoriordan.tumblr.com/post/105337717180/feistypadalecki-castiel-sleeping#notes

Oh, the relief and the rapture that filled his heart. No monster was revealed, but the sweetest and fairest of all creatures, at whose sight the very lamp seemed to shine brighter. In his first shame at his folly and lack of faith, Dean fell on his knees and would have plunged the knife into his own breast if it had not fallen from his trembling hands.

But those same unsteady hands that saved him betrayed him, too, for as he hung over him, ravished at the sight of him and unable to deny himself the bliss of filling his eyes with his beauty, some hot oil fell from the lamp upon his shoulder. He started awake: he saw the light and knew Dean's faithlessness, and without a word he fled from him.

Dean rushed out after him into the night. He could not see him, but he heard his voice speaking to him. He told Dean who he was, and sadly bade him farewell. "Love cannot live where there is no trust," he said, and flew away.

'The God of Love!" he thought. "He was my husband, and I, assbutt that I am, could not keep faith with him. Is he gone from me forever? At any rate," he told himself with rising courage, "I can spend the rest of my life searching for him. If he has no more love left for me, at least I can show him how much I love him." And he started on his journey. He had no idea where to go; he knew only that he would never give up looking for him.

(Happily-ever-after ending to come in Part 3.)

In Other Fan Fiction News: Squee! Rainbow Rowell is writing Carry On, a book about Simon Snow (and, I should really hope, Baz too). Its projected release date is in October 2015, and it will contain Simon Snow fan art by actual fangirls. It's super meta, and I'm so excited. Is this going to be the first mainstream bestseller based on same sex romantic fan fiction?

Someone Please Stop Me Before I Fanfic Again

Mourning angel in Florence, Italy. Photo by Mark Voorendt, April 2001.

I have a serious problem and I must be stopped. I turned to The Good Book for help, and I saw that it said:

"And it came to pass, when men began to multiply on the face of the earth, and daughters were born unto them,
That the sons of God saw the daughters of men that they were fair; and they took them wives of all which they chose.
And the Lord said, My spirit shall not always strive with man, for that he also is flesh: yet his days shall be an hundred and twenty years.
There were giants in the earth in those days; and also after that, when the sons of God came in unto the daughters of men, and they bare children to them, the same became mighty men which were of old, men of renown."

(Genesis 6:1-4, in the beautiful archaic English of the King James Bible. In the Hebrew Bible, Genesis is called Bereshit, Hebrew for "In the Beginning.")

Interpretations of this odd ancient passage vary, but it seems to be about male angels having sex with human women. However, it's male angel-human man sex that I can't seem to get out of my mind. But really, if human-angel sex is allowed by the Bible, it should be an acceptable subject for me to write about, right?

Even if it's Destiel fan fiction? Because after yesterday's video, I did another thing, in the paper-bound notebook:

Immediately after Cas tells Sam and Dean about having sex with April (this video), Dean leaves the room. Sam tells Cas that Dean is upset, but Cas can't understand why.

Photo by Gage Skidmore. Cropped. 

"You mean you really don't know?"

"I'm afraid I don't understand, Sam."

"The bond between you and Dean - it makes him feel a certain way about you. He can't stand the thought of you with someone else."

Cas is shocked. "Dean has...romantic feelings...for me?"

Sam claps a hand over Cas's shoulder. "He loves you."

Their eyes meet. "I didn't mean to hurt him, Sam. April is a wonderful woman: she's beautiful, kind, and so unselfish. I felt lonely, she wished to comfort me, and this body reacted to her."

Sam nods. "I get it, Cas, but Dean won't. He only knows how he feels about you, and right now he feels like you betrayed him."

"I would never."

They hear the door slam, and Cas realizes Dean has heard their whole conversation. He runs out after him, into the night. [Okay, it's day time in the video. I used some creative license. It's more dramatic in the late evening, after sunset.]

"Dean!"

Dean stops midway to the Impala, but doesn't turn around. "Leave me alone, Cas."

"Dean, I'm sorry. I didn't know."

Dean turns his head, his green eyes narrowed in anger. "After all this time, how could you not know?"

"I've never been human before. Your feelings are all new to me."

"Yeah? Well, it sounds like you figured them out with April."

"Dean, I like April as a person, but she and I can never have the bond you and I have."

"I know, Cas! That's why it hurts! How could you be with her and not me?"

Silence hangs in the air between them. Dean's breath leaves him in puffs of steam. Cas closes the space between them, but he knows better than to touch Dean. He does force Dean to look him in the eyes, though.

Photo by Gage Skidmore. I cropped it at PicMonkey. 

"Dean Winchester, I did not mean to hurt you, but I will not do so again. I vow to you that as long as you live, I will not make love with another being, human or angel. I will not ask you to make the same vow. I would not take away your freedom."

Dean's eyes are filled with tears. Cas longs to wipe them away, but he doesn't dare touch the other man.

"You don't know what you're saying, Cas."

"I do. I'm an angel of the Lord, Dean. I don't know how to lie."

In a quiet voice, Dean asks, "You would be my lover, Castiel?"

"Yes, Dean. I would like to know how your lips would feel against mine. This body reacts to you. It likes the way you walk and the way you smell. April allowed me to taste her. The scent of her body was...there are no words for the pleasure." He exhales as Dean rolls his eyes. "I would like to taste you. I would like to take you in my mouth and give you pleasure until your release, and then taste your essence. I would burn for you, and I hope you would let me inside you. April's body yielded to mine - would you do the same, warrior? Could you allow yourself to be so open?"

"Stop." Dean's chest heaves, his breathing hard.

Cas nods. "I'll leave you alone. I will keep my vow, and I hope you can accept my apologies." Cas turns back toward the house.

"Castiel." The angel turns, looking into Dean's eyes once more. The anger has softened. "I won't be your experiment. If we make love, it has to be because you care about me."

"I have always cared about you, Dean, body and soul."

Dean closes his eyes. His voice has a husky catch to it. "Not tonight," he says.

Cas nods. "Not tonight."

"I'm still angry with you."

"I know."

All at once, Dean takes Cas's face in both hands, caresses his cheeks, pulls him in, and kisses him deeply. Despite his dull human senses, every cell in Cas's body seems to react, and the evening's cold disappears. He is suddenly, desperately aware of how badly his body longs for Dean's.

They separate. Dean gets in the car and drives away. Cas skips dinner with Sam. Instead he takes a long shower and lies down to sleep.

When he wakes in the middle of the night, Cas is aware of Dean's body on the bed beside him, close but not touching him. He longs to pull Dean into his embrace, but he must wait for Dean's anger to cool first. He leans his face in toward Dean's, slightly, hoping to feel the warmth of his body.

***

Send help before I progress from angsty, suggestive fanfics to explicit angel buttsex. I really enjoy the phrase "angel buttsex," mind you.

I have been on Tumblr too long. Halp.

I've Added a #Destiel Fan Video to My YouTube Channel

Dear readers, I have all the classic signs of infatuation with a new ship. Having been introduced to fictional characters Dean Winchester and Castiel, an angel of the Lord, on Tumblr, I now cannot help but think of them as a romantic couple. It started with simply reblogging a few Tumblr posts, and then I had that weird male-pregnancy dream. 

From there, I progressed to reading a few fanfic stories on FanFiction.net. I knew that some people shipped the two Winchester brothers together as a romantic couple, but I didn't realize that Dean-Sam-Castiel was also a thing. FanFiction.net was my introduction to Wincestiel (Winchester incest+Castiel). Not to be a Judgy Judy, but I don't think I want to ship that. I know that consenting adults over the age of 18 can do as they please - especially when said adults are fictional - but brothers as romantic couples are a bit outside of my interests. (I think they are bio siblings. It would be slightly different if one of them was adopted.) 

But I am not judging you if that's your thing. You won't hurt Sam and Dean. They don't actually exist. 

The weirdest part is that I've still never even watched the first episode of Supernatural. 

Anyhoo, somehow the song "Angels Would Fall" by Melissa Etheridge got stuck in my head. I did a quick check of YouTube to see whether anyone had used this song in a Destiel fan video. I couldn't find one, so I decided that one should be made. Ta-da!

For the images, I visited the Pinterest pages of Isabella Disraeli, whom you may remember from "Shippin' 'Em Like FedEx." Her Destiel board is at http://www.pinterest.com/mscandida/castiel-dean/.

I don't do much with my YouTube channel, and I'll probably do even less once I start my new day job in a marketing department an hour's commute from home. But, should you decide to visit me there, you'll find a little clip of me in Milwaukee, a few Person of Interest fan videos, videos I made for Peaches and Shonen Knife songs I liked, a book trailer for "Spicy, Earthy, Sweet," literary music videos for The Count of Monte Cristo and James Jones' Whistle...it's really eclectic. 

#BookReview Fangirl by Rainbow Rowell

Paradoxically, the more I like a book, the less I can think to say about it. There are books I love to pieces - The Book Thief, The Fault in Our Stars, The Amber Spyglass, and Shanghai Girls, to name a few - but haven't reviewed on this blog, because "this book oh my god askjdhfbjdkalldhjasjkhchsklslla;" is not a legitimate book review. Sometimes I can't seem to get around the cartoon hearts that replace the pupils in my eyes when I love a truly great book.

Hence, what I wrote about Rainbow Rowell's Fangirl when I finished it Friday night was short.

Fangirl by Rainbow Rowell
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Some books make you feel like you want to climb inside and live in their worlds - this book made me feel like I'd already lived in this world. Except for the absent mother and the twin, I am the Cather in so many ways. I relate to so much of what she says, does, and thinks. The familiarity is some of the fun of this novel, but the real attraction is Rowell's writing style, which is funny, intimate and clear and contains just the right amount of snark to be charming and clever but not too clever for its own good. I haven't read either of Rowell's previous novels [Attachments and Eleanor & Park], but based on the strength of this effort alone, I think I can call myself a fan.

FYI, this is a must-read for all Potterheads.

View all my reviews on Goodreads

Let's talk about Levi. Perfect book boyfriend? For Cath, yes, he is - even though he kissed the blonde girl in his kitchen. (The way the two of them deal with this event, which occurred before they were dating, I feel is very realistic.) He loves her fan fiction, he brings her coffee, he's gentle and funny, and just sigh. Again, I think Rowell has written very realistically of first love. It's a feeling I quite enjoy revisiting, which is why I love Twilight so much. So I am pro-Levi.

(That's right, I love Twilight. I reserve the right to love things that aren't perfect - deal with it.)

Let's talk about Simon Snow. I honestly would love it if someone wrote Carry On, Simon as Cath, because the little bits of fan fiction that we get in the novel are tasty. Cath left her magnum opus unfinished (and, may I just say, I think the ending of this novel is perfection and I wouldn't want it any other way), but I still want to know if she decided to kill Baz or to let Simon and Baz live happily ever after. We're somewhat left hanging in a Hazel Grace Lancaster-type fashion.

This book is meta to begin with - fiction about a fiction writer writing fan fiction about fiction - would it just be too incredibly meta for someone to write Carry On, Simon?

FYI, Canadian writer Brian Jones writes Carry On, Cath on Wattpad - fan fiction about a fan fiction writer. Too meta? I don't know, but I like it.

Let's talk about how Simon and Baz use the names of magicians when they swear. So cute! They swear on Aleister Crowley and Doug Henning. (Although I contend the world's best Doug Henning joke is on The Simpsons when Cregg Demon, Magicfreek! says he's going to go back to Canada and run for Parliament.)

I'm not sure that Aleister Crowley is anyone you'd really want to look up to, but I still think it's adorable to have fictional magicians within a fictional narrative swearing on the names of real-life magicians (one of the stage, one of actual magical practice, although I'm sure Crowley did his fair share of showmanship as well. He seemed to have enjoyed shocking people, and I also think it is in this anarchic, anti-authoritarian spirit that the Beatles placed Crowley on the Sgt. Pepper's cover).

What else can I say about Fangirl? I think it's an instant classic, and it's definitely one of my new favorites.

#FridaysReads 'Fangirl' and 'The Lost Sun'

I'm currently reading Rainbow Rowell's Fangirl and loving it! The synopsis from Goodreads:

"From the author of the New York Times bestseller Eleanor and Park.

"A coming-of-age tale of fan fiction, family and first love. 

"Cath is a Simon Snow fan.

"Okay, the whole world is a Simon Snow fan . . .

"But for Cath, being a fan is her life — and she’s really good at it. She and her twin sister, Wren, ensconced themselves in the Simon Snow series when they were just kids; it’s what got them through their mother leaving.

"Reading. Rereading. Hanging out in Simon Snow forums, writing Simon Snow fan fiction, dressing up like the characters for every movie premiere.

"Cath’s sister has mostly grown away from fandom, but Cath can’t let go. She doesn’t want to.

"Now that they’re going to college, Wren has told Cath she doesn’t want to be roommates. Cath is on her own, completely outside of her comfort zone. She’s got a surly roommate with a charming, always-around boyfriend, a fiction-writing professor who thinks fan fiction is the end of the civilized world, a handsome classmate who only wants to talk about words . . . And she can’t stop worrying about her dad, who’s loving and fragile and has never really been alone.

"For Cath, the question is: Can she do this?

"Can she make it without Wren holding her hand? Is she ready to start living her own life? Writing her own stories?

"And does she even want to move on if it means leaving Simon Snow behind?"

Simon Snow, for those who don't know, is a fictionalized version of Harry Potter. (A fictionalized version of a fictional character? It's kind of meta, but that's what it is.) Cath and Wren are well-know in the Simon Snow fandom as the co-writers of an ongoing romance series between Simon and his roommate Baz. Baz is, essentially, Draco Malfoy. Essentially, Cath ships Drarry - really, really hard. If you've ever been in a fandom and you're familiar with fanfics and shipping, you'll probably find this book highly amusing. 

If you find it highly amusing that there are people who get into fandoms and know terms like fanfics and shipping, you'll probably find this book highly amusing. 

Cath and Wren are from Omaha, Nebraska. 

I'm also about 100 pages into The Lost Sun by Tessa Gratton. Its Goodreads synopsis:

"Fans of Neil Gaiman's American Gods and Holly Black's The Curse Workers will embrace this richly drawn, Norse-mythology-infused alternate world: the United States of Asgard. Seventeen-year-old Soren Bearskin is trying to escape the past. His father, a famed warrior, lost himself to the battle-frenzy and killed thirteen innocent people. Soren cannot deny that berserking is in his blood--the fevers, insomnia, and occasional feelings of uncontrollable rage haunt him. So he tries to remain calm and detached from everyone at Sanctus Sigurd's Academy. But that's hard to do when a popular, beautiful girl like Astrid Glyn tells Soren she dreams of him. That's not all Astrid dreams of--the daughter of a renowned prophetess, Astrid is coming into her own inherited abilities. 

"When Baldur, son of Odin and one of the most popular gods in the country, goes missing, Astrid sees where he is and convinces Soren to join her on a road trip that will take them to find not only a lost god, but also who they are beyond the legacy of their parents and everything they've been told they have to be."

Gratton has written this book in a fairly brilliant way. It's set in a contemporary, familiar world (the 21st century U.S.A.), using familiar modern language, yet there's just enough Norse mythology and Germanic folkways to make it resonate with the time-honored sagas of the English language and its cultural ancestors (think Beowulf). Gratton is a scholar of Old English, but this novel is in the voice of a modern teenager. 

I don't think I'm explaining it well, but it's really well done. 

Heather at Blonde, Undercover Blonde had a good idea today: to link to all the reviews she's done so far in 2013. I don't want to link to every single one, but here's one for every month:

January - The Count of Monte Cristo
February - Cora: The Unwilling Queen
March - The Art of Disappearing
April - Hemingway's Girl
May - Lover At Last
June - In the Body of the World
July - Divergent
August - Insurgent
September - Finding Esta
October - Princesses Behaving Badly