Erin O'Riordan writes smart, whimsical erotica. Her erotic romance novel trilogy, Pagan Spirits, is now available. With her husband, she also writes crime novels. Visit her home page at ko-fi.com.
Happy 12-12-12! Tonight's Hebraical hottie is none other than Jewish rock star P!nk herself, a.k.a Alecia Beth Moore. The 33-year-old Pennsylvania native is the daughter of a Catholic father and a Jewish mother.
http://pinterest.com/pin/173529391861632833/
Jewish chicks - rockin' the cat-eyes black eyeliner look since we were slaves in Egypt.
Musically, P!nk had me hooked from her first hit, "There You Go." The grammar is appalling, but you must remember her crashing her motorcycle through her ex's window.
In "Slut Like You" from her 2012 album, P!nk isn't afraid to reclaim the "slut" label from those who would use it as a slur, or to apply it to guys.
For sheer musical girl power, you can hardly do better than the Moulin Rouge collaboration of P!nk with Christina Aguilera, Mya, Lil Kim and Missy Elliot on "Lady Marmalade." This single was like the Spice Girls of the 00s.
In this Pepsi commercial, she must engage in gladiatorial combat - sort of - against Beyonce and Britney Spears.
She was a Weekend Crush once upon a time at Dorothy Surrenders. DS also clued me in to P!nk's collaboration with Peaches, the world's greatest bisexual Canadian rapper/electro musician of Jewish descent. The song is called "Oh My God," and I like to think of it as a sincere prayer as well as a song about women having sex with women.
P!nk is just teasing all the lesbian/bi/pan girls, though; she's a straight girl. She is, however, listed in The Bisexual's Guide to the Universe by Nicole Kristal and Mike Szymanski as having once said, "I'm trisexual. I'll try anything once."
Also, P!nk is in Catacombs, a mind-numbingly stupid 2007 horror film set at a rave in the underground cemeteries of Paris. The film sucks, but props to P!nk for taking her turn as a scream queen, a horror film convention perfected by Hebrew hottie Jamie Lee Curtis.
First things first: I haven't seen the Season 5 finale of True Blood yet. Just the other day, I tweeted:
Tara says, "Pam and me - never gonna happen," but I so hope it does. #TrueBlood
— Erin O'Riordan (@ErinORiordan) August 26, 2012
Yesterday I happened to stop by Dorothy Surrenders, and I got a little bit of a Season 5 spoiler: Pam and Tara kissed. Yes!
Speaking of kisses, the other night I dreamed Adrien Brody kissed me. I was sitting beside my father at the time, and it was more of a friendly/chaste kiss than anything lustful, but it was still pretty darn nice. So much nicer than the dream I had in which William Shatner kissed me. You know who I really wish Adrien Brody kissed, though? Nick Stahl.
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Nick Stahl has a small role as Ed Bead in The Thin Red Line, and Brody plays Cpl. Jeffrey Fife. In James Jones' novel, Bead is a clerk who works under Fife, and the two have an arrangement to take care of each other sexually (even though they both swear up and down that they're not gay). When the 19-year-old Iowan Bead is shot in the side, Bead calls for Fife to come hold his hand. Fife momentarily worries about what the others will think, but instinctively puts his arms around Bead as Bead dies. You won't see any of that in the movie, but in the book, it's a very moving, poignant scene.
I shall return to reading The Thin Red Line after my Jeopardy! tryout, in mid-September.
Speaking of films based on literature, yesterday I watched Raintree County, the second movie Elizabeth Taylor and Montgomery Clift starred in together (after A Place in the Sun, before Suddenly Last Summer).
This one's literary backup is a lengthy 1948 novel by Ross Lockridge Jr. I can promise you now, I have no intention of reading the 1000+ page behemoth - I read Gone With the Wind several years ago, and though I quite liked it, I have no immediate need to read another sprawling Civil War epic. Lockridge, it should be noted, is another of my fellow Indiana-born authors; Meg Cabot was born in his hometown of Bloomington, Indiana. The fictional location, Raintree County, is in Indiana, and the raintree of the title is a mythical plant allegedly planted there by Johnny Appleseed.
The hero, John Shawnessy (Clift), is a dreamy, idealistic, romantic poet and, eventually, schoolteacher in the late 1850s/early 1860s. He and his youthful sweetheart Nell (Eva Marie Saint) are perfectly matched, but his head is turned by Southern belle Susanna (Taylor). As revealed in the trailer, she gets him to marry her by tricking him into thinking she's pregnant - but Susanna has serious mental health problems.
Actually, Susanna has a lot in common with Sawyer on Lost. Her mother, jealous of Susanna's Cuban-born nanny, jumped to the conclusion (perhaps correctly so) that Susanna's father and the nanny were having an affair, shot them both to death, then set the family mansion on fire to cover up the crime, killing herself in the process. Nine-year-old Susanna was rescued by one of the family's slaves. She still has the creepy-looking burnt doll that was saved from the fire along with her.
John makes a valiant effort to make his marriage to Susanna work. When she runs off to the South with their young son during the early days of the Civil War, he decides to join the Union army effort in hopes of finding her. I said:
Montgomery Clift looks super hot in his Union uniform, but I do not dig the Civil War beard.
— Erin O'Riordan (@ErinORiordan) August 28, 2012
As a Union soldier, he probably fought against the ancestors of Kentucky-born Robert E. Lee Prewitt. Either way, he finds his son, is wounded, and eventually gets reunited with Susanna, now confined to a mental institution.
He takes her home and attempts to care for her back in Indiana, where after the war he resumes teaching and considers a career in politics. But Susanna escapes into the swamp, where she drowns, a probable suicide. John fears their son may have met the same sad fate, but he and Nell find the unfortunate little boy safe, though grieving his mother, in the swamp.
That's the end of the movie, but I hope that in the book John goes on to a happy second marriage with the still-unmarried Nell. Nell has never stopped loving John.
My favorite scene in the movie? The bathtub. John has agreed to run a foot race against Flash, a friendly rival. Flash has an unusually high tolerance for liquor, and the young, inexperienced John tries to match him drink-for-drink. John's friends then attempt to sober him up for the race by throwing him into a bathtub and throwing cold water on him - and prompting me to say:
Monty in the bathtub - so hawt.
— Erin O'Riordan (@ErinORiordan) August 28, 2012
Shirtless Montgomery Clift in From Here to Eternity (take a look here) was perfectly shaved/waxed and had flawless abs. In Raintree County (filmed four years later) he still has fantastic abs, but went with the more natural, unshaven look. Either way, this is a beautiful, beautiful man. I rank Monty's bathtub scene up there with Christian Bale's shower scene in American Psycho - not that we get to see much, but just in terms of how happy it makes me.
Dorothy Surrenders: best lesbian pop culture blog in the blogiverse? I think so. Whether it's Naked Lady Monday, Tank Top Tuesday, Gender Fuck Friday or My Weekend Crush, Dorothy Snarker always brings the lady hotness, with a good dose of feminist strength. There is, however, one glaring omission from Dorothy Surrenders:
No Taraji P. Henson.
My fondest hope is that one day Dorothy will catch an episode of Person of Interest, take note of Detective Josselyn Carter's Afghan vet/NYPD Homicide Task Force/single mom badassery and make Taraji her Weekend Crush. This will have to hold me over until that moment.
Is it hot in here, Taraji, or is it just you?
Here and there on the Internet (cough) POI Tumblrs I stalk the shit out of (cough) I hear that some people don't like Detective Josselyn Carter. I do not understand the words in that sentence. This is like saying, "I don't like Wonder Woman" or "I don't like Princess Leia." Makes no sense.
...AND the PETA ad. Sure, I shared it before, but it's always worth seeing again.
Just saw Percy Jackson and the Olympians: The Lightning Thief. I'm a little surprised there was no representation of any of the major Greek goddesses - Hera, Hestia and Demeter. I'm a little surprised that Persephone had the lightning bolt - she could have ruled the gods!- and was satisfied just to give it away and settle for her lot in (after)life.
I didn't read the book, so I don't know whether this inability to imagine female power/divinity comes from Rick Riordan or from the filmmakers. Annoying, though. Persephone was a key figure in Greek mythology, worshiped in the Elysian Mysteries for the possibility that she could bring about the reincarnation of dead souls. This film reduces her to a desperate housewife.
I can imagine Persephone, the virgin goddess of spring/Queen of the Underworld as the ruler of the gods, and thus the divinity with the most influence on the earth, as a powerful goddess. She would rule the world with mercy and kindness, the qualities for which the ancient Greeks prayed to her and the ancient Romans prayed to Proserpina, her equivalent. We wouldn't fear death, because merciful Persephone would allow us to come back in new bodies.
I feel very protective of Persephone because I identify with her as "my" goddess. I want her to be empowered. I want her pairing with Hades to be an equal and happy match. I don't believe she's a helpless being trapped in Hell. For one thing, it's a cultural mistake to equate the Greek concept of the Underworld with the Zoroastrian/Christian vision of Hell.
I did like the casting of Rosario Dawson. Even though I remember her from silly projects like Josie and the Pussycats and Men in Black II, she projects strength, even when playing a slighted damsel in distress. Dawson is beautiful enough to pass as the Goddess of Spring.
Rosario Dawson by Dysepsion, Creative Commons license
The other goddess-figure who appears in this film is Athena. In mythology, she's a virgin goddess, so I'm somewhat perplexed that Percy befriends Annabeth, a daughter of Athena. Annabeth's a great character - she's a warrior. She's also well-versed in Greek mythology, sort of a Hermione Granger without the middle-school awkwardness. I have a hard time picturing Athena with a mortal lover - but I'll gladly permit authors and filmmakers their creative license to rewrite the classical myths.
I just wish there wasn't such a creative blind spot when it comes to envisioning the divine feminine.
What is it about you Jews from Minnesota and changing your names? Bob Zimmerman wants everybody to call him Bob Dylan, and Winona Horowitz is much more famously known as Winona Ryder.
Winona Ryder has:
-Played Mina Murray-Harker in the Francis Ford Coppola Dracula
-Been featured on my all-time favorite episode of my all-time favorite show, the "Lisa's Rival" episode of The Simpsons
-Caused Johnny Depp to get a tattoo that said "Winona Forever." When they broke up, he had it altered to say "Wino Forever."
-Not only starred as Jo in Little Women, but did so opposite Christian Bale as Laurie. She introduced Bale to his wife, makeup artist Sandra "Sibi" Blazic, and so could even be considered an honorary member of the Steinem-Bale family.
-Been featured several times now on Gender Fuck Thursdays at Dorothy Surrenders. In other words, she's shown a distinct preference for dressing in the clothing of the male sex
In other words, she is not only one hot Yiddish mama, she's also an integral part of girl culture. Winona, I'm sorry I bumped from my list of the 10 people with whom I'd most like to drink wine. Forget Colin Firth. He's gone. You can have your spot back.
Join me HERE on December 28th for a special Hanukkah post and giveaway.
Photo by Eric Weiss, Creative Commons License. Not the Houdini one, though - his name was spelled Erik Weisz
Everyone over the age of 16 should see the movie Howl, starring James Franco as American poet Allen Ginsberg. It's a brilliant film about a seminal American book. Every word of dialogue comes from Ginsberg's poetry and writings or the transcript of the obscenity trial to which the book's publisher was subjected. (The publisher won.)
James Franco is a fine actor, and I like him in this, but I don't quite buy the illusion of him as Allen Ginsberg. He doesn't quite have the right spirit. Maybe that's just because I so admire Ginsberg and his poetry. When he died in 1997, losing his cancer battle at only 71, I grieved for his loss as if I knew him. I didn't know him, except through his words, but that's what good poetry does to you. When the poet dies, a little part of the reader dies, too.
The movie also has David Strathairn, as the prosecutor in the obscenity trial. Why do I love David Strathairn? For playing the regal Theseus in A Midsummer Night's Dream. (The Hippolyta opposite him isn't very Amazonian, but it's too late to go back and fix that now.) He's kind of big in literature-based films. If you're a huge fan of children's books and their screen adaptations, you may know him as Arthur Spiderwick in The Spiderwick Chronicles. If you're a fan of Stephen King adaptations, you might known him as Dolores Claiborne's asshole husband. However, his best-known role may be as Edward R. Murrow in Good Night, and Good Luck, an intriguing historical drama with the hotness factor of George Clooney + Robert Downey, Jr. (That one was not based on a book; Clooney wrote it with Grant Heslov.)
(This is Titania and Bottom, not Theseus and Hippolyta, but we do know from the play that Theseus and Titania had been lovers.)
I wrote a derivative poem once, based on "Footnote to Howl." I call it "Moist Howlette."
"Sacred! Sacred! Sacred! My poet, my prophet, my Jewish saint and guru declares that all is sacred!
The world is divine! The soul is divine! The skin is sacred! The vulva is sacred! The tongue and cock and hand and asshole sacred!
Everybody’s sacred! Everywhere’s sacred! Every thing is sacred! Every day is an eternity! Every man and woman is an angel!
The sacred whore’s as holy as the seraphim! The sex worker is holy as you my soul are holy! The clitoral orgasm’s as sacred as the vaginal orgasm!
The keyboard is sacred the poem is sacred the voice is sacred the hearers and readers are sacred the ecstasy is sacred!
Holy Erin holy Allen holy Purrrrrrrrr holy Kathryn E holy Walt Whitman holy Joan Jett holy fuckers holy every human angel!
Sacred the vibrators! Sacred, the cock and the cock ring and the clit and the clit ring!
Sacred the groaning saxophone! Sacred the orgasm apocalypse! Sacred the womb scrotum balls peace and junk and drums!
Sacred the solitudes of men’s rooms and elevators! Sacred the strip clubs filled with the millions! Sacred the mysterious rivers of cum and pussy juice and blood and sweat and tears under the sheets!
Sacred the lesbian and the gay man! Sacred the bisexual! Sacred the straight feminist and sexual shepherds of rebellion!
Sacred the supernatural extra brilliant intelligent kindness of Allen Ginsberg’s dear departed soul!"
And now for something completely different.
This award comes from Shah Wharton, writer extraordinaire and proprietress of Words in Sync. As an award recipient, I'm supposed to pass the award along to 15 other bloggers.
These are 15 of the most fabulous-est blogs, in alphabetical order:
Back in August I discovered Hunk du Jour, a yum-a-licious blog covered with photos of beautiful men. This morning I discovered its feminine equivalent, Dorothy Surrenders.
Dorothy Surrenders is a lesbian website posting hot photos of the girls whom girls love to ogle. Its author is Dorothy Snarker - ha! Its motto? "A Gay Gal's Guide to Pop Culture. Why Let the Boys Have All the Fun?"
Why indeed? Since I stumbled upon DS this morning, thought I'd share some of my favorite chicas (a sampling of my celeb girl crushes) from its virtual pages. Click to view the hotness!
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