Mother’s day is a time to celebrate Mom but it’s also a great day to take time to be nurtured, seen, appreciated, loved, and taken care of. Not all of us are mothers BUT we all need mothering sometimes. Not everyone’s Mom was June Cleaver but here’s what I’ve learned: no matter how amazing your mother has been – no matter how much she loved and nurtured you – she is not perfect. No mother is.
In other words, none of us have found in our mothers the opportunity to ALWAYS be seen, always be heard, always have our opinion valued, always be given the benefit of the doubt, always be respected. As you grow up, as a side-effect, you might feel unseen, undervalued, and unheard. Maybe you were told that you were “too much” or “not enough” of something but regardless of what your story is, chances are that story had a HUGE effect on your life and how you see yourself. Right?
My mom did the best she could with what she had but she left some not-so-savory held beliefs inside of me. But I forgive her and I realize she’ll never be able to give me what that little girl inside me needs – full acceptance and permission to be my own person, which is essential to being a happy and healthy person.
Once I figured it out, I decided it was time to find that acceptance and happiness – and stop at nothing for that permission to be big and fully successful. What did I do? I found the Mother inside of myself. You can find her, too. Call her your inner Mother, Great Mother, Goddess, Big Mama… whatever you like but SHE can mother you into fully loving and valuing yourself.
Accessing her is easier than you think. You need to cultivate a relationship with her and one of the simplest ways to do that is to create a dialogue with her. It seems corny but try writing a letter to yourself from her. If you do ANYTHING today, it’s this little homework assignment – write a letter to yourself from your inner mother. Don’t be shy. I’ll show you what my inner mother wrote to me:
Dear Joanna,
You are so important to me. I see you and love you, for YOU, for who YOU are, not for whom I think you should be. I don’t need for you to be anything for me. I want you to be YOU. You, beautiful, you. You can be yourself with me, I will love you no matter what.
Because I see how valuable you are, how magical you are, how wonderful you are, how alive you are. I love every last bit of what I see, both in your strengths and in your imperfections.
Joanna, I don’t need for you to do or be anything. You owe me nothing. I am here to love you and keep you safe, and doing this and being in your gorgeous presence is ALL I need from you.
I don’t want or need or expect you to take care of me - I will do that on my own. I trust you and your instinct and your heart. I respect you. I honor you. And my wish is that you enjoy your life, and also remember to have fun often.
Love yourself fiercely, The Real Mama
What does your inner mother say to you?
Joanna Lindenbaum, M.A., has 12 years of teaching and coaching experience. As a life coach and founder of Soulful Coaching for Busy Women, she invites women to think bigger, to embrace their power, and to create more compelling and exciting goals for themselves. Her coaching philosophy centers on a deep respect for the inner wisdom that each woman holds inside of herself. By activating this inner wisdom, Joanna helps her clients achieve extraordinary success in business, career, and life. Sign up for Joanna’s free eCourse and overcome the 5 most common obstacles to the life of your dreams.
Showing posts with label creativity. Show all posts
Showing posts with label creativity. Show all posts
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
Tuesday, May 3, 2011
Because It's There: How to Make Your Book a Reality (guest post by Angie Dixon)
My latest book just came out, and I’ve been taking some time to think about that.
I wrote my first book in 1997, and self-published it after it was rejected 104 times. That’s not a typo; there’s a zero in the middle.
My latest book, The Leonardo Trait: Create the Life You Were Born to Live (2nd Edition), is also a self-published effort, but only after I canceled arrangements with two publishers and decided to do it myself, to get it done after two years of waiting on someone else.
Quite a difference there, from a book no one wanted to a book two different publishers wanted, even if they didn’t carry through on their wishes. But the difference is not in the books (although The Leonardo Trait 2nd Edition is way better than my first book).
The difference is in me as a person.
When I wrote my first book, I wanted to write a book, and I did. I’ve written several since, and I love writing. But I also had to learn to love the process of being an author—with all the rejection and sometimes tedious work that entails. At one point, someone mentioned how “lucky” I am as a writer. I said, rather caustically, “It’s amazing how lucky you get when you sit down and work at it 60 hours a week.” The comment was about my “luck” in getting an agent. The truth was, I spent over 100 hours researching and querying agents. Luck was not involved. And that’s what I tell writers.
Sure, you may have a coincidence or a “bit of luck,” but you’re not going to become a successful author through luck.
That’s the good news, because if it’s not about luck, it’s completely in your control.
Of course, most people aren’t willing to assume that control, but when you do, your life becomes your own for the first time.
As an author, you need to know, and remember, who you are.
You are someone with powerful words that need to be expressed. And if you don’t tell your story or share your message, no one else will. No one else can. As an author, you have to persist and work and hang on even when you don’t think that you can, because you are the only one who can.
You have to do it because it needs to be done.
Keep writing and keep pushing forward because it’s there. And along the way you’ll experience a little luck, perhaps, but you won’t need it.
Angie Dixon is the author of the groundbreaking creativity book, The Leonardo Trait: Create the Life You Were Born to Live. Take Angie’s free creativity quiz at http://www.TheLeonardoTrait.com and discover your creativity style.
I wrote my first book in 1997, and self-published it after it was rejected 104 times. That’s not a typo; there’s a zero in the middle.
My latest book, The Leonardo Trait: Create the Life You Were Born to Live (2nd Edition), is also a self-published effort, but only after I canceled arrangements with two publishers and decided to do it myself, to get it done after two years of waiting on someone else.
Quite a difference there, from a book no one wanted to a book two different publishers wanted, even if they didn’t carry through on their wishes. But the difference is not in the books (although The Leonardo Trait 2nd Edition is way better than my first book).
The difference is in me as a person.
When I wrote my first book, I wanted to write a book, and I did. I’ve written several since, and I love writing. But I also had to learn to love the process of being an author—with all the rejection and sometimes tedious work that entails. At one point, someone mentioned how “lucky” I am as a writer. I said, rather caustically, “It’s amazing how lucky you get when you sit down and work at it 60 hours a week.” The comment was about my “luck” in getting an agent. The truth was, I spent over 100 hours researching and querying agents. Luck was not involved. And that’s what I tell writers.
Sure, you may have a coincidence or a “bit of luck,” but you’re not going to become a successful author through luck.
That’s the good news, because if it’s not about luck, it’s completely in your control.
Of course, most people aren’t willing to assume that control, but when you do, your life becomes your own for the first time.
As an author, you need to know, and remember, who you are.
You are someone with powerful words that need to be expressed. And if you don’t tell your story or share your message, no one else will. No one else can. As an author, you have to persist and work and hang on even when you don’t think that you can, because you are the only one who can.
You have to do it because it needs to be done.
Keep writing and keep pushing forward because it’s there. And along the way you’ll experience a little luck, perhaps, but you won’t need it.
Angie Dixon is the author of the groundbreaking creativity book, The Leonardo Trait: Create the Life You Were Born to Live. Take Angie’s free creativity quiz at http://www.TheLeonardoTrait.com and discover your creativity style.
Monday, March 7, 2011
"Creativity and the Human Soul" by Gwen Fox - Guest Post
There are many reasons we as humans create…one of the first was to show direction for fellow followers. So, what is our reason to create today? Why is creativity so very important to our lives?
The one thing we have in common with everyone in the universe is creativity. It is in our DNA. Creativity is the thread that binds all of us together...how fabulous is that !!! When we let our creative energy surge through our body without conscious thought we reach a place within us that is sacred.
As a professional artist and teacher I witness this struggle of “Am I creative?” every workshop. Students who have finally given themselves permission to delve into their desire to create also ask themselves “Will I embarrass myself?” Some enter the room with great trepidation, some are shy, quiet and then there are those who consider this a fun exciting experience. By the end of the workshop each student has found a friend within themselves…a friend they had all along but didn’t know existed.
Women are the worse in recognizing and giving into the need of examining their creativity. Why do women put aside this yearning? Perhaps it is because we are raised to be “giving." We are the caretakers and this takes precedence over our own desires.
I was raised on a farm in East Tennessee and my fabulous Mother wallpapered the hallway of the old farmhouse in plain wallpaper and gave me permission to draw to my hearts content. She repapered the hallway each week for many years. I grew up thinking all children were allowed to draw, color and create on the walls!
The big question is this: Why do we fight this need, this yearning…this essential component in our lives? Do we consider it frivolous? Are we told we need to be more serious?
There are many things I don’t know but I do know this:
When we forsake our life’s longing, perhaps our purpose in life, we deny our children the pleasure of witnessing our growth. Mothers who give themselves permission to honor their creativity then open the way for their children to pursue theirs. This is especially true for our daughters.
There is a quote I love that was written by a French essayist, ”With everyone born human, a poet--an artist--is born, who dies young and who is survived by an adult."
Our creative explorations feed our soul, enrich our lives and enhance those around us. Creativity is where your soul wants to sing…Come home to your heart and listen.
Gwen Fox is a professional artist and teacher. She has been referred to as “the bridge between art and spirituality”. Gwen has forged a new paradigm in the world of art as she helps her students tap into their inner strength and peel away limiting beliefs. Gwen can be reached by email - gwen@gwenfox.com Her website is www.gwenfox.com
This post was originally published at Unstarving Artist
The one thing we have in common with everyone in the universe is creativity. It is in our DNA. Creativity is the thread that binds all of us together...how fabulous is that !!! When we let our creative energy surge through our body without conscious thought we reach a place within us that is sacred.
As a professional artist and teacher I witness this struggle of “Am I creative?” every workshop. Students who have finally given themselves permission to delve into their desire to create also ask themselves “Will I embarrass myself?” Some enter the room with great trepidation, some are shy, quiet and then there are those who consider this a fun exciting experience. By the end of the workshop each student has found a friend within themselves…a friend they had all along but didn’t know existed.
Women are the worse in recognizing and giving into the need of examining their creativity. Why do women put aside this yearning? Perhaps it is because we are raised to be “giving." We are the caretakers and this takes precedence over our own desires.
I was raised on a farm in East Tennessee and my fabulous Mother wallpapered the hallway of the old farmhouse in plain wallpaper and gave me permission to draw to my hearts content. She repapered the hallway each week for many years. I grew up thinking all children were allowed to draw, color and create on the walls!
The big question is this: Why do we fight this need, this yearning…this essential component in our lives? Do we consider it frivolous? Are we told we need to be more serious?
There are many things I don’t know but I do know this:
When we forsake our life’s longing, perhaps our purpose in life, we deny our children the pleasure of witnessing our growth. Mothers who give themselves permission to honor their creativity then open the way for their children to pursue theirs. This is especially true for our daughters.
There is a quote I love that was written by a French essayist, ”With everyone born human, a poet--an artist--is born, who dies young and who is survived by an adult."
Our creative explorations feed our soul, enrich our lives and enhance those around us. Creativity is where your soul wants to sing…Come home to your heart and listen.
Gwen Fox is a professional artist and teacher. She has been referred to as “the bridge between art and spirituality”. Gwen has forged a new paradigm in the world of art as she helps her students tap into their inner strength and peel away limiting beliefs. Gwen can be reached by email - gwen@gwenfox.com Her website is www.gwenfox.com
This post was originally published at Unstarving Artist
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)