Erin's Dream Diary: The Beltane Fertility Dream

The wheel of the year turns to Beltane, the cross-quarter holiday halfway between the Spring Equinox and the Summer Solstice. Symbolically, this is the time of union and consummation between the God and Goddess, representing renewal of the fertility of the Earth.

Bright blessings to you and yours if you're celebrating Beltane or May Day as a Neopagan, Wiccan, or witch.

Maypole dance. Public domain image by KenL

But this is going to be a personal post. I went to sleep on Beltane Eve, and this is what I dreamed:

I was a high school kid. I had a rare blood condition (probably nothing that exists in real life), so every day after school I had to go to the nurse's station in the school basement to get an injection. Oddly enough, there was another kid at the same school who had the same condition. He was Robert Downey Jr., high school kid version. We were friends.

RDJ: representing masculine energy/the God in my subconscious. Possibly because during the day I'd seen a commercial with Blythe Danner, mother of Gwyneth Paltrow who plays Pepper Pots in the Iron Man movies. I had briefly entertained fantasies of Danner appearing in a future film as Tony Stark's mother-in-law. Hence, the image of Downey as Stark had crossed my mind.

In addition to the nurse's station, the school basement contained the cafeteria, some art classrooms, and a staircase that led up to the gym (much like in the high school I actually went to). After our treatment one day, RDJ and I wandered around the mostly-unoccupied basement. He was joking about wanting to have sex with me.

We found an unguarded stash of snacks bound for the cafeteria and snagged a bag of Cheetos. Then we sat on the gym steps, eating our ill-gotten gains, and I joked that I was sexually aroused by Cheetos.

Cheetos. Public domain image by SCEhardt

Well, playful banter and junk food - one thing leads to another, resulting in actual sex. Then, actual sex again on a second occasion.

We were careful and used condoms both times, but not careful enough, because I became pregnant. Nine months later, we had a beautiful baby girl. Miraculously, she didn't even have our weird blood thing.

At first, he was a pretty cool dad. But then…well, let me back up. I was part of a church group that, on very cold days, would give rides to homeless people and give them warm places to stay temporarily. One cold day when the baby was still only a few months old, I was hanging out with a homeless woman who, if I had been awake, I would have said was my dad's late aunt Marcella. We'll just call her Marcella.

Marcella wanted me to go buy her a bottle of liquor. I said no, because A. I was still only 18 years old, not legal to buy alcohol in the United States, and B. I had to take care of the baby. But I did have access to an airplane-size bottle of some kind of alcoholic beverage, which I gave her.

Creative Commons image by Fernando Carrizo

Marcella complained that she did not like the taste. I gave her a can of Pepsi to mix it with. She didn't care for that either, so I gave her an airplane-size bottle of coconut rum instead. Marcella continued to complain and became increasingly disruptive until I asked her to step outside. We tussled. I had to put her in a bear hug so she didn't beat me up.

At this point, RDJ became very, "Oh, fuck this," and had some of his friends come pick him up. They went out and partied. He stayed out partying with his friends for weeks on end, forgoing his familial responsibilities. I figured I was abandoned and a single parent. Depressing, but I had to keep it together for the kiddo.

But as I was about to graduate from high school and planning to go to an art school, he came back. The party-boy phase was over, and he was ready to settle down. RDJ and I got married - and he turned out to be really good at parenting.

Happily ever after. Because those are the kinds of dreams a romance writer has.

Previous Dream Diary Entries:

A Wonderful Vampire Dream
The Adam Levine Dream
The Boy
The Inspirational Zombie Dream
Window Into the Mind of an Erotica Author
Yugoslavia!

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The Wheel of the Year is a beginner's guide to celebrating the eight traditional pagan festivals of the the year.