Thursday, September 22, 2011

The Older Dudes I'd Most Like to See Lewd

This just-for-fun post was provoked by the author Elizabeth Black and her Man Candy Tuesday post this week. (Elizabeth and I both wrote stories in Torquere Press's Vamps anthology.) In celebration of her May-December erotic romance Don't Call Me Baby, Elizabeth posted photos of some of the hotties who inspire her work.

I had a ton of fun writing "5 Jewish Dudes I'd Most Like to See Lewd," so I now present the older dudes I'd most like to see lewd. Harrison Ford made my Jewish dudes list, and the day I saw Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part Two I blogged about my crushes on Alan Rickman and Colin Firth. These are the other three.

I was really good and used public domain photos from Wikimedia Commons, with proper attribution - but they weren't the best photos. So I replaced them. Sometimes you have to bend the rules a bit.

1. Jean Reno. Two words: The Professional. P.S. He speaks French and starred in the film adaptation of one of my favorite books, The Da Vinci Code.

The French song I'd like to insert here is "Judas Mon Ceour" off Belly's Sweet Ride, album, but since no one seems to have uploaded it to YouTube, this is my "French" alternative. Ooh la la indeed, Harry Potter's long-lost sister Grace. Jean Reno, voulez-vous coucher avec moi ce soir?

2. Chow Yun Fat. I do not care about your stereotypical remarks about Chinese dudes and baby carrots, Austin Ruth. Chow Yun Fat is hot.

3. Gabriel Byrne. It's not just the Irishness, or the fact that his lips have touched Ellen Barkin. It's not just the fact that he played history's hottest poet, Lord Byron, in the off-the-wall Ken Russell film Gothic. There's something about his piercing stare, his beautiful blue eyes...even when he's playing the devil, you've gotta root for him.

Some people say Stigmata is a bad movie. I say, "How could it be? Gabriel Byrne is a horny priest who makes out with Patricia Arquette. She's the hottest of all the Arquettes." Plus, I love the idea of a female, 21st-century Francis of Assisi.

No comments: